After dealing with student after student who’s fallen in love and lost all connection with logic, it has come to my understanding that I need give my opinion on love and why its important to view it objectively. This so-called seduction community is full of men who want to get women, but what happens when they actually get with the women? They get over emotional, they ask for advice, and the men in the community tell them to just move onto another girl. So thats the advice? Get the girls and then just move on when you can no longer handle it? I’d like to meet the guru who first established this tactic.
Imagine you knew little to nothing about cars, but you bought a car anyway. The gas tank was on full when you bought it, so you go off driving. You’re having the time of your life and then all of a sudden the car slows down and eventually comes to a stop. At this point you have no idea whats going on – this was a perfectly good vehicle just moments ago. So you call the guy who sold you the car and you say “ Hey man, the car just stopped.. Its not working like it once was. What do I do? “ and he says “ Oh. This is when you just get a new car” . You reply “ I invested money into this car!” and all he can say is “ It didn’t work out with this one. You just have to get a new one “.
Thats is what is being taught in the seduction community. When things don’t work out with a girl; just move on and get a new one. No one is teaching us about gas and gas stations. And like the car analogy, no matter what car you get; they’ll all eventually run out of gas. With the understanding of what gas is and how to refill the car with gas, you’ll be able to drive any quality car for as long as you please.
Welcome to exxon mobile.
So the question is “ What Is Love? “
The answers can always get deeper, but I think on a surface level we can all agree that love is an emotion. Right?
Love is an emotion just as fear is an emotion; like anger is an emotion etc.
So lets put love aside for a moment and discuss another emotion; one we can all relate to… Lets talk about fear.
I would go deep into what fear is, but I don’t feel a need to reinvent the wheel. This guy below pretty much nails it. Watch this and we’ll continue
F.E.A.R – False Evidence Appearing Real
“ Your fear is always about whats going to happen next. That means your fear is always about that which does not exist. If your fear is about the non existent, your fear is one hundred percent imaginary. If you’re suffering from the non existential, we call that insanity. “
Socially acceptable levels of insanity…
How many of us are constantly afraid of our own imagination?
How many of us are suffering from our own emotions?
So wouldn’t that mean that having a fear about approaching a woman is a mild form of insanity. What is it exactly that we’re afraid of? In what way does that fear serve us?
We have to begin to observe our fears and eliminate the ones that serve no purpose what so ever. Purposeless fear is true insanity. For example: a man that is afraid to stand on the edge of a rooftop certainly hasn’t lost his mind. He fears potentially slipping and ruining his life. So the fear of heights on a mild level is useful to protect whoever has that fear from danger – understandable; the fear serves a purpose. Now what if that fear got out of control. What if the fear of heights grew so big that one couldn’t even be on the inside of a tall building? We would then view that man as insane. So this brings me to the big question concerning fear(which is an emotion just as LOVE is an Emotion). Is this mans fear of being inside a tall building valid? Just because his emotion is telling him that it is dangerous to be inside the building, does that mean that it is in fact dangerous? Surely it doesn’t, it is just something his own subconscious created within him for one reason or another. You following?
Now what about the people lost in love? Sure love is great; falling in love feels great, I’m not talking about the people who are healthily in love. The emotion serves a purpose in healthy situations. It allows there to be a amorous bond between two people which allows them to come together and potentially build a family to further the human population. It affords them happiness, passion, meaning to life, and so many other things. But here I’m talking about the men and women who are in destructive relationships and assume that just because they FEEL an emotion; it means that they must follow that feeling. Its insanity, just like the example of the man above who is afraid to enter a tall building.
I believe all feelings have to be monitored. We have to begin to understand them for what they are. They are just FEELINGS, and only have purpose when we attribute it to them. A mans stage freight doesn’t mean that he doesn’t belong on stage, an angered man feeling like physically attacking the person in front of him does not mean he should, and just because you feel emotionally drawn to a woman or man that does not mean that you have to be with them.
Emotions help us interpret life; emotions are not interpretations of life.
I was once the guy that let his emotions get the best of him with women far too often. It was a routine for me; I was constantly falling in love and thinking that just because I felt the need to call a girl ten times back to back when she didn’t answer that I had to. I lacked self control; and because I let my emotions get the best of me. The women in my life lost respect for me and my emotional immaturity began to push them away. It wasn’t until enough trail and error that something finally clicked in my brain. I realized that the emotions that were occurring in my body were just FEELINGS, nothing more – JUST FEELINGS. I began to understand the importance of being objective about the meaning I would attribute to these emotions. I was then able to figure out which ones were healthy to act on, and which ones would be a burden to others to act on. This allowed me some level of mastery over myself and the women in my life all once began to develop a richer level of respect for me as a man. They viewed me as someone they could turn to when there emotions were on the rise. I was no longer a burden to them, I was one who could show them how to prevent themselves from being a burden to others.
If you take anything from this, understand that emotions are simply feelings to help us get through life. They are not the meaning of life. Lets begin to evaluate our emotions and figure out which ones have purpose and which ones do not. Not all feelings of love have purpose, just as not all feelings of fear, jealousy, and anger have purpose. Act on the feelings that have been adding value to your life and find creative ways to channel the ones that do not. And just remember that your FEELING of emotions at times can mean absolutely nothing. Consciously control the subconscious; because it will try its best to subconsciously control you.
Peace & Love
Email me: EddieFews@WayOfThePlayer.com For 1 on 1 coaching or consultation via Skype, phone or IM.