The Power In A Proper Compliment

There has been a myth going around the seduction community for some time that you should never compliment a woman on her looks. That instead you should point out something unique that a guy doesn’t usually compliment her on to get her attention. While I agree that an indirect compliment will definitely lift a woman’s spirits, I can’t help but laugh at the guys who are afraid to acknowledge a woman’s beauty. And I won’t even bother addressing the men who think they have to NEG – say something negative to knock an attractive woman off her high horse just to get her attention. I would only advise the men on that level of social immaturity to get a horse of their own before they even think about connecting with the opposite sex. But back to the subject at hand..

I believe that a proper compliment based solely off of a woman’s looks is the best way to connect with her. Women carry purses that are usually filled with items to touch up their appearance( make up, mirrors, etc.) which only suggest that they worry about what they look like a lot more than men do. What better way to ease the mind of a woman than to let her know that she doesn’t have to worry about how she is begin perceived at that moment. Having put her mind at ease, she can now contemplate other matters.. perhaps even.. YOU?

Now there is a catch..

The compliment certainly has to be unique and more than unique it has to be genuine. A compliment such as “ You’re beautiful/sexy/hot/cute/pretty” is unreacted to for several reasons.

Reason #1

It’s obvious-She hears this ALL the time.

Reason #2

When you say “ You’re beautiful” you are stating it as if it is a fact. While YOU may perceive her as beautiful she may be the complete opposite to someone else. Now although she may hear the word beautiful all the time; changing “ You’re beautiful “ to “ I THINK you are beautiful “ will get you a completely different reaction – I guarantee it.

Reason #3

There is no YOU in this compliment. What more is she supposed to say other than “ Thank You ” while walking away. Exactly how do the men that walk around calling women “hot” expect them to respond? Did you think they will lean into you and start making out with you? Grab your hand, take out a pen, and write their phone number on it? In what reality does this happen and why is it that the urban man sits around waiting for miracles instead of making them happen. This is your life; waiting will only get you what waiting has already gotten you.. Which is what?

Women wear tight dresses, high heels, and even walk the way they do because they WANT to be viewed as attractive. They want some guy to be confident enough in both himself and her to compliment her beauty without fear. So compliment her beauty relentlessly, do so with passion, high energy and she’ll love for you it.

The trick to successfully complimenting a woman’s looks is to state how the way she looks is making YOU feel. She doesn’t want to know she is attractive as much as she wants to know how much her attractiveness is affecting YOU. This is about YOU, this isn’t about her looking a certain way; it’s about her beauty filling YOU with fire and desire from the inside out. No woman can resist a man confident enough to express how tempted he is to give into weakness because of her beauty.

I’ll give you an example..

Back when I experimented with the online dating thing, I realized that all men would do is compliment a woman on her looks and the women hated it. Why? Because they weren’t doing it the proper way. They would all say “ Hey Beautiful, Hey sexy, you’re hot etc. “. Now as you stated before, they could of received more responses if they said “ I think you’re sexy, I think you’re hot etc “, but I decided to take a different approach. I was going to describe in one or two lines how the way a woman looked was making me feel. I never had to read profiles.. I would just monitor my emotions while looking at their pictures and just describe this to them.

One of my favorite lines was “ damn girl..you make me wanna knit the both of us matching sweaters.“

I could send that to ten girls and get seven responses, because I was stating how the way she looked was making me FEEL.

A proper compliment tailored to a woman’s looks also does something powerful for your benefit. Not only will paying a woman a proper compliment heighten the way she perceives herself, but it will also heighten the way she perceives you. We’ve all heard the expression “ It takes one to know one “ and people are only mirrors of ourselves after all. When you comment to a person on anything they subconsciously think it must have something to do with you. So by validating her attractiveness you are also validating your own.

I used to date this girl named Natalia, and boy was she BEAUTIFUL… But she wasn’t always that way. Natalia was my next door neighbor when I lived in the suburbs. And before we were together I would see her from time to time, but I never really thought anything of her. Then one day I had a friend over who came into my house excited saying he had no idea I had such a sexy neighbor. He was also wondering why I had never made a move on her. I told him I didn’t think she was all that cute, and he told me I was crazy. So immaturely I said to myself “ Fine, I’m just going to sleep with her to score some cool points with my boy; not to mention, the idea of sleeping with a next door neighbor is a bit exciting.”

The next day I looked her up on facebook ( we went to high school together, she was three years older) and sent her a message:

Me: Hey, there’s this cute girl that lives in my neighbor hood.. You know her?

Her: (I don’t remember what she said but it was something like..) Haha yeah that’s me 🙂

Me: Dope.. So can I borrow some sugar?

Her: Sure 😉

I think she thought I was joking, but I went right on over, knocked on her door and asked for sugar. She laughed, we talked for a bit and then we exchanged phone numbers. The whole time I am thinking “ This girl is not all that attractive -I’m not even sure I want to go through with this “. But I was on a mission and I was going to complete it. I called her a couple days later, chatted with her for 20 minutes and then invited her over for a back yard picnic. So there we were, hanging out in my backyard, me still thinking she’s not that cute, and then it all started… She went into a mind state where she began describing to me how attractive I was for about fifteen minutes. She had been in a metaphorical cocoon and once the compliments began to rain, she broke out and emerged as a butterfly. My eyes glazed over and I was hers. I ate it up and for the first time since I had seen her I began to view her as all of the things she was telling me I was.

“ Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” – General Lew Wallace

“ A pimple turns to a dimple when you’re in love” – Japanese Proverb

Long story short

I fell more in love with Natalia that I’ve ever fallen for any woman in my entire life, all because she made a habit of constantly telling me how amazing I was. And as I stated above; subconsciously I would associate all of these great things with her even though my original opinions of her were negative. Her opinions of me, became my opinions of her and she knew this. I had fallen for her, I became emotional over her, and she began looking for a new male the conquer with her silver forked tongue.

There is a lot of power in the compliment and we must also realize that the more compliments we give out to others the more compliments we get in return. Compliments boost both someone else’s confidence and our own so it’s a win-win situation. Just make sure they’re genuine, original and tailed directly to the person. “I like your dress” doesn’t cut it; it’s cliche and heard by someone somewhere every single day. Try “ That dress goes great with the tone of your skin, how did you know to pick that color? “ That’ll open up the person and get the conversation flowing, but just remember that it has to be honest and genuine. If you love women enough, this will all be easy for you. Just begin expressing to them how much you really do LOVE specific things about them and how these things are making you FEEL.

Eddie Fews


 

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Take Control Over Your Emotion

After dealing with student after student who’s fallen in love and lost all connection with logic, it has come to my understanding that I need give my opinion on love and why its important to view it objectively. This so-called seduction community is full of men who want to get women, but what happens when they actually get with the women? They get over emotional, they ask for advice, and the men in the community tell them to just move onto another girl. So thats the advice? Get the girls and then just move on when you can no longer handle it? I’d like to meet the guru who first established this tactic.

Imagine you knew little to nothing about cars, but you bought a car anyway. The gas tank was on full when you bought it, so you go off driving. You’re having the time of your life and then all of a sudden the car slows down and eventually comes to a stop. At this point you have no idea whats going on – this was a perfectly good vehicle just moments ago. So you call the guy who sold you the car and you say “ Hey man, the car just stopped.. Its not working like it once was. What do I do? “ and he says “ Oh. This is when you just get a new car” . You reply “ I invested money into this car!” and all he can say is “ It didn’t work out with this one. You just have to get a new one “.

Thats is what is being taught in the seduction community. When things don’t work out with a girl; just move on and get a new one. No one is teaching us about gas and gas stations.  And like the car analogy, no matter what car you get; they’ll all eventually run out of gas. With the understanding of what gas is and how to refill the car with gas, you’ll be able to drive any quality car for as long as you please.

Welcome to exxon mobile.

So the question is “ What Is Love? “

The answers can always get deeper, but I think on a surface level we can all agree that love is an emotion. Right?

Love is an emotion just as fear is an emotion; like anger is an emotion etc.

So lets put love aside for a moment and discuss another emotion; one we can all relate to… Lets talk about fear.

I would go deep into what fear is, but I don’t feel a need to reinvent the wheel. This guy below pretty much nails it. Watch this and we’ll continue

 

F.E.A.R – False Evidence Appearing Real

“ Your fear is always about whats going to happen next. That means your fear is always about that which does not exist. If your fear is about the non existent, your fear is one hundred percent imaginary. If you’re suffering from the non existential, we call that insanity. “

Socially acceptable levels of insanity…

How many of us are constantly afraid of our own imagination?

How many of us are suffering from our own emotions?

So wouldn’t that mean that having a fear about approaching a woman is a mild form of insanity. What is it exactly that we’re afraid of? In what way does that fear serve us?

We have to begin to observe our fears and eliminate the ones that serve no purpose what so ever. Purposeless fear is true insanity. For example: a man that is afraid to stand on the edge of a rooftop certainly hasn’t lost his mind. He fears potentially slipping and ruining his life. So the fear of heights on a mild level is useful to protect whoever has that fear from danger – understandable; the fear serves a purpose. Now what if that fear got out of control. What if the fear of heights grew so big that one couldn’t even be on the inside of a tall building? We would then view that man as insane. So this brings me to the big question concerning fear(which is an emotion just as LOVE is an Emotion). Is this mans fear of being inside a tall building valid? Just because his emotion is telling him that it is dangerous to be inside the building, does that mean that it is in fact dangerous? Surely it doesn’t, it is just something his own subconscious created within him for one reason or another. You following?

Now what about the people lost in love? Sure love is great; falling in love feels great, I’m not talking about the people who are healthily in love. The emotion serves a purpose in healthy situations. It allows there to be a amorous bond between two people which allows them to come together and potentially build a family to further the human population. It affords them happiness, passion, meaning to life, and so many other things. But here I’m talking about the men and women who are in destructive relationships and assume that just because they FEEL an emotion; it means that they must follow that feeling. Its insanity, just like the example of the man above who is afraid to enter a tall building.

I believe all feelings have to be monitored. We have to begin to understand them for what they are. They are just FEELINGS, and only have purpose when we attribute it to them. A mans stage freight doesn’t mean that he doesn’t belong on stage, an angered man feeling like physically attacking the person in front of him does not mean he should, and just because you feel emotionally drawn to a woman or man that does not mean that you have to be with them.

Emotions help us interpret life; emotions are not interpretations of life.

I was once the guy that let his emotions get the best of him with women far too often. It was a routine for me; I was constantly falling in love and thinking that just because I felt the need to call a girl ten times back to back when she didn’t answer that I had to. I lacked self control; and because I let my emotions get the best of me. The women in my life lost respect for me and my emotional immaturity began to push them away. It wasn’t until enough trail and error that something finally clicked in my brain. I realized that the emotions that were occurring in my body were just FEELINGS, nothing more – JUST FEELINGS. I began to understand the importance of being objective about the meaning I would attribute to these emotions. I was then able to figure out which ones were healthy to act on, and which ones would be a burden to others to act on. This allowed me some level of mastery over myself and the women in my life all once began to develop a richer level of respect for me as a man. They viewed me as someone they could turn to when there emotions were on the rise. I was no longer a burden to them, I was one who could show them how to prevent themselves from being a burden to others.

If you take anything from this, understand that emotions are simply feelings to help us get through life. They are not the meaning of life. Lets begin to evaluate our emotions and figure out which ones have purpose and which ones do not. Not all feelings of love have purpose, just as not all feelings of fear, jealousy, and anger have purpose. Act on the feelings that  have been adding value to your life and find creative ways to channel the ones that do not. And just remember that your FEELING of emotions at times can mean absolutely nothing. Consciously control the subconscious; because it will try its best to subconsciously control you.

Peace & Love   


Email me: EddieFews@WayOfThePlayer.com For 1 on 1 coaching or consultation via Skype, phone or IM.

The Secret Laws Of Social Wisdom

My new Ebook ” The Secret Laws Of Social Wisdom” is now available. Each has law been designed in such a way that when followed a man will add to his overall level of social intelligence,magnetism, and presence. Below is a sample of five of the fifty laws you will receive once you purchase the book. click here to go to LuLu and download your own personal copy and if you are currently not in position finically to purchase the book email me at EddieFews@WayOfThePlayer.com I will send you a copy of the book free of charge. 

Law 7

The World Is Always Watching

All things done in the dark eventually have to come to the light and a leader follows the mantra that, “character is what you do while no one is watching you”. And by “no one” the law means “no one”. While following the law it is important to understand that every single action taken by a man every single day has an effect on his aura, body language and presence. Therefore one is never able to hide anything; and the follower of the law must live his life with the understanding that this is true. Law number seven requires that the follower of the law lives their life as if there was a camera crew following them every step of the way and all of the footage was being sent to all the women and men one eventually wanted to have some level of opportunity with. Whether that be a business opportunity or a romantic type of opportunity. If a man sits in his house all day long doing nothing, when he knows that he has responsibilities to be taking care of, the people in his life will know it. It is likely that they will not know directly, but they will know on an energetic level. Women will feel less attracted to him that day, men will be less friendly with him that day, and if it perpetuates, so will the effects that follow. If a man wouldn’t sit on his sofa watching tell-lie-vision and eating potato chips all day long if the girl of his dreams was watching him he is not permitted to do it without her around. Because the fact of the matter is, when a man finally does run into that girl everything he has ever done will be attached to his body language, presence, and aura. We cannot hide anything; this world was not designed this way. We must own up to our words, actions and habits one way or another. Men will notice that they will attract a lot more women when they begin to live their life as if the women were already there. Follow the law and live a life filled with more integrity, because all will know on some level all of the things that every man has done.

“Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not.”

—Oprah Winfrey

Law 16 

The Pedestal Is For All Or None

A man’s status is never determined by how much money he has made or by the level of fame he has achieved. A man’s status is determined by the character he exhibits. There are bad people who are rich and famous, just as there are good people who are rich and famous. Any man that has ever spent personal time in a room with someone who is admired or of high levels of wealth becomes aware that this man or woman is just as flawed as themselves. Usually all the greatness they are said to have is reserved and just channeled in the moments that count. They are the same people,  with a different direction of focus. This comparison can also be applied to beautiful women. If one had the opportunity to follow a highly attractive women for a week and see all she thought, and did they will find that she isn’t nearly as beautiful as their minds made her out to be.  She’s flawed, and many times more flawed than oneself because the world has allowed her to live a lie most of her life. In many cases no one has rejected her, she’s constantly offered things for free, and no one has criticized her. So is it any surprise that the majority of beautiful women are lacking in personality? What did they need a personality for? They were already fully accepted into society for being beautiful; for being something that they didn’t even choose to be. Law number 16 requires that the follower of the law comes to an understanding that no one is above oneself; no one gets put on a pedestal, unless everyone is put on a pedestal. There is a very thin line between what separates the people we admire from ourselves. And often times we find that the things we wanted weren’t what we thought when we got them. The new car or house only made one feel differently momentarily;  the true peace is found within. And the rich and famous have usually figured that out because they have acquired the tangibles that people dream about and its done nothing for them internally. Follow the law and understand that the only people that can have power over us are the people we give it to.

“He thinks too highly of me, places me on a pedestal i’ve never deserved.” 

— Tahereh Mafi 

Law 19

Always Tell The Truth

Few men have the confidence to look a woman square in the eyes when he is tested by her and tell her the truth. And it is usually the women of the highest quality that are going to put forth the most challenging test because they are mastered at questioning a man on the things he may be insecure about. A woman isn’t concerned with what a man has or what a man does as much is she concerned with how he feels about what he has and what he does. She’s looking to the man to see how she should feel about him based SOLEY upon how he feels about himself. Now a low quality superficial woman may be looking toward a man for what he has acquired, but a high quality woman is only looking into the man. A quality woman doesn’t reject an impoverished man because he is in poverty; she is rejecting him because of how he feels about his poverty. A poor man with a dream that he is actively working toward has no problem getting a woman. There are men like this everywhere. This is why a man must always tell the truth and be confident about his truth. A truthful man is truthful because he has accepted himself for who he is and is confident that if is he is in an unfortunate situation he is capable enough to get himself out of the situation. He also believes that the people around him will be able to pick up that he can get himself out of anything he is in. So he is honest. And because he is confidently honest, people believe in him and his ability. Law number 19 requires that every man is honest with everyone that he comes across. A lie only makes one feel momentarily content with an unsatisfactory situation. It’s almost like taking a drug to escape from the current reality. Eventually one will have to confront reality, and the more it has been pushed to the side the more difficult it will be to live with when it is forced to the surface. Follow the law and always tell the truth. An honest man radiates with a light that draws people toward him.

“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.” 

— Groucho Marx

 

Law 27

Rebalance Your Sensitivity 

To utilize the teachings of this book to their full potential; you must begin to fight against some of the numbing that is occurring to our generation. The greatest seducers are sensitive. They can feel what’s going on in their bodies, the person they’re withs body and what’s happening in the world around them. Increasing sensitivity is a challenging way to live, but once it’s mastered it allows the bearer of sensitivity to excel far beyond all who are desensitized. If you have ever increased your computer mouse sensitivity, you’ll notice that it is a lot more difficult to maneuver at first but when mastered it allows you to control your computer at speeds you couldn’t before. Below are a collective group of steps that can be taken to increase ones level of sensitivity.

The Numbing Of The Senses

Anyone that lives in a big city understand that they are constantly bombarded with loud noises from every angle. Whether it be from the music coming from the cars driving by or the screeching sounds coming from the steel train cars stopping along the tracks. Most will notice that the first few times they are confronted with these noises they’ll have to cover their ears because of the pain felt. After a while the loud noises no longer hurt the ears; one becomes used to them – one has become numb to them. This same process takes place with the blasting of music into the ears. The music goes from being too loud, to not being loud enough. We are living in a world that is constantly numbing us and that takes place with bright LED lights to the eyes – going from too bright to bearable. Foul smells coming from a polluted environment which go from being stinky to the point where one can no longer smell them. Chemical preservatives and salts on the food that go from being too salty to enjoyable. etc. etc.

The number of the senses causes one to be incapable of picking up on the subtle cues that would make a man an effective with social wisdom. If a man hearing has been so numbed that he isn’t able to pick up on the small little sounds  and tones generated from a women at different moments he won’t be aware of all he needs to know to effectively lead her.  Numbed eyes will prevent one from efficiently making eye contact, numbed touch prevents one from being able to feel oneself feeling another which is imperative for a seductive touch(Law 4), and so on.

Law number six requires that the follower of the law practices rebalancing their sensitivity. Stop taking in preservatives and harmful food additives that numb the senses. While listening to music keep the music volume lower than 75% and cover the ears when fronted with loud sounds. When met with a foul smell, focus on the smell and see it for what it is. No one should let oneself get so comfortable with a foul smell that they forget it’s there… and so on. Rebalance your sensitivity in every way possible so that you begin to embody the ability to deal with and pick up on needs for social wisdom faster than before.

“The most important innovators often don’t need any technologies – just imagination and acute sensitivity to people’s needs. “

Geoff Mulgan

 

Law 39

Never Be Ashamed

Women are likely to be more upset about your reaction to a performance problem than the problem itself. Women are always looking to us to validate how they should feel about a situation. So if a mans feelings are neutral showing that he is unaffected by his woman’s feelings she will then question whether the emotion she feels is valid in the first place. Lets say a woman does not feel content with her relationship and because of this she goes to her man attempting to break up with him. If the man reacts emotionally in an “ how could you do this? “ type of manner she will feel as if  she must have some validity behind her feelings because it was the source of her partners momentary passion. Now, if the man says “ No honey. Lets just talk later on when our feelings settle. I think we have something great here” from a neutral point of few, she will begin to wonder if she was making the right decision at all. Her decision didn’t bring about any emotion in her partner; and because he was unaffected she must wonder whether or not the things she said were even effective. And so it is the law to never show shame, because a woman will only respond negatively to mans short coming in any given situation if he first expresses a negative reaction to his own short coming. Men who learn this will find that women that attempt to reject them after an approach suddenly begin to be more receptive to the male if they see that he wasn’t swayed positively or negatively by her reaction. She must question whether or not she had any reason to reject the guy because it meant absolutely nothing to him. So does it mean anything at all? The first rejections are almost always a test of a mans character and strength – the two primary things a woman looks for in a man. Even if a man has a overly positive reaction she will question whether she made the right choice. She will begin to feel as if she did him a favor. And if she did him a favor, by natural law he owes her one. This will instantly put him in a subservient position. So Follow the law and embrace all aspects of who you are; the world must first need to see you ashamed before they can become ashamed of you.

“With integrity, you have nothing to fear, since you have nothing to hide. With integrity, you will do the right thing, so you will have no guilt.”

— Zig Ziglar


Email me: EddieFews@WayOfThePlayer.com For 1 on 1 coaching or consultation via Skype, phone or IM.

The 7 Things All Men Need To Stop Doing

Lying To Women

The isn’t a chronological list that’s in order of ” most important to least important” but this first one is more important than any of the others. The bad reputation that is associated with “players” is directly linked back to the lies players have been known to tell in order to get what they want. No one hates the guy that is sexual active and completely honest about it, but we all hate the guy who lies and tries to hide his reputation. This generation more than any other has become aware of how much owning your truth can affect your life. Take a look at someone like charlamange the god(the most popular urban radio personality), he says controversial things all the time and has a bit of a bad reputation. So what allows him to continue to be successful despite his reputation? What allows people that are more world reknown to love and respect him? The fact that he is always honest when he is confronted with the truth. He’s publicly spoke about his penis size and him taking magnum rx pills to try an enlarge it to no avail; along with many other things. And he remains to be accepted because he isn’t ashamed of his decisions.

The past is the past and there is nothing that can be done to change that. Lying about it only lowers your own self worth and confidence. Every time you lie you take a step down in consciousness, and every time you tell the truth you take a step up. People may not always directly know when you’re lying, but they can feel it. There is always a noticeable shift in the vibe when someone gives into weakness and decides to be dishonest.

I find that quality women make a point to bait us into lying when we first approach them; they ask us a question because they want to see if we’re “real” or not. In that moment, they’ll look us into the eye and wait for our response; checking to see if we pass the “real/fake” challenge. Now if we lie, they’ll lose all attraction for us and we’ll find ourselves in a position where we “can’t think of anything to say”. At that point we have to move on to the next girl; or confess our lie and see what happens.

If you deal with quality women you know exactly what i’m talking about, but even if you don’t, this is a good practice that’ll prepare you for the moments when you are.

Telling People Who They Slept With

This is another big one; who you sleep with is your business and your business alone. What you and your girlfriend do behind closed doors is not something to brag to your boys about. Girls gossip, leave that to them; as players we have to have a bit more integrity. Getting laid is no longer some badge of honor; that’s high school stuff. If you feel the need to talk about it, chances are it doesn’t happen to you often.

And I don’t know about you guys, but when a guy tells me all the wild things he’s been doing with his girl it’s a bit of a challenge to view her the same. Naturally you’ll sexualize them in your mind; and I don’t want that for me or any of my friends. Also, when you’re a guy that keep his business on the low; a lot more women will gravitate to you. They’ll feel like they can trust you and they’ll get a bit wilder in the bed with you than they would with the average Joe. It’s all in the vibe you give off and your character(the things you do when no one is watching) effects your vibe. So give off that ” what we do is our business and no one else’s ” vibe and watch how much more attention you’ll get from women.

i.e. Think about Vegas.. the famous quote ” what happens in Vegas stays in vegas” inspires many women every night to get a little loose.

Bros Before Hoes

I love women just as much as the next guy but a lot of these interactions are temporary. What we have with are boys has usually been in place for sometime and has a higher probability of being in place than things in place with women. Think about it.. how many of your boys from the past are you still cool with? How many of the women from your past can you still rely on? That speaks for itself.

Nothing fustrates a guy more when his buddy chooses a woman over his friends. Because if she’s a real girl, someone you can have a sustainable relationship with, you won’t have to choose.

Don’t leave your boy alone to go get laid, don’t sneak around with women he likes behind his back even if he can’t get with them – unless he gives you the green light. There are billions of other women to choose from so your bros must always always come first. This is the rule; friendships hold a lot more value then pussy does.

Keeping Score

I notice that a lot of guys keep a count of the number of women they sleep with as if that is suppose to mean something. I know a number of guys that have slept with a lot of women but I don’t consider them players. Mainly because they had to lie and manipulate to get what they want. If you have to lie to get laid; the lay is empty and meaningless. That empty feeling will usually follow up behind each new partner.

Players aren’t out there sleeping with women to validate themselves. Players just genuinely love women and/or love having sex with them. The amount doesn’t matter; we’re validated by how thoroughly we serve our purpose, and not by the sexual acts we engage in with others. Don’t count the number and certainly don’t brag about what the number already is. Do things because you enjoy them and not because they make you feel better about yourself.

The Blame Game

I find it odd that men consider themselves leaders when they point fingers at women for the downfall of their relationships. It’s a kings job to successfully lead his kingdom dispite it’s condition. Could you imagine if Barack Obama started pointing fingers at the American citizens for the downfall of the American encomonmy? What kind of leader would he be? Sure some people inherit difficult situations like our current president has; but he still has to do his best to change things or risk being nailed to the cross.

No where in history has the collective group of citizens in nation been blamed for the destruction of their civilization. We hear about Cesar, Napoleon, Alexander the great, Hitler, Stalin etc. They are the ones that take the wrap; not the people that follow. So as a leader in your relationship/group of friends, you are never to blame them for the reason things went left. Accept full responsibility, unless you’re not a leader of course; and if you aren’t a leader, you aren’t a player so this article isn’t for you.

Keeping Quiet

I was in my local market the other day and at the counter was a boy around the age 10. He was speaking to the store clerk about which over the counter pain reliever he should take for his headache. In his hand was a soda and he waited as the clerk reached to hand him a Tylenol. Surprised by the situation I stepped in immediately and spoke to the kid first ” 90% of headaches come from a lack of water in the body, so if you put that soda back and grab a bottle of water you should feel better. “

He went on to what I suggested and as he left I had a quick word with the clerk. ” you know better than that man, that kid is only ten years old”. He knodded to me in shame, I paid for my items and left.

I say this to say; speak up for what’s right. We all fall short; I don’t speak up as much as I should, but it’s important that we fight through our natural resistance and do what’s right. There is a powerful feeling that comes from doing something positive for someone else. You’ll feel better, you raise a level in consciousness, and you will be aiding a fellow human at the same time. Sounds like a win, win, win to me. Everyday we are presented with opportunities to take a stand. So do not hold your tongue, stand up and speak your truth even if it means you’ll be taking a temporary loss. This is what being a true leader is all about.

Tunnel Vision On Pussy

Pussy is great, love is awesome, and women are even better, but there is more to life. The majority of the men that I’ve met that are great with women don’t have much money. Seducting women is their sharpest skill and it tends to be what consumes all of their time. As a result they are left with a lot of sex, but very little cash to live off of. That’s where the women come in and help support them; so it doesn’t fully click that they may have to make money on their own. Players don’t live like this; a true player will not sacrifice a shot at an advancement in their personal life for a shot at a new piece of ass.

Sure if you want to be the best you have to dedicate a lot of you off time to improving, but don’t forget that there is more to life. We all have a purpose and a reason for living; life is about advancing and leaving things behind when we past that can help the next generation. What work are you leaving behind for others? Children to raise? That’s all it will be until you begin to think about chasing things other than women.

A player chases himself first; women will always come second to that.

There are many more of these things that we as players must stop doing, but let’s crawl before we walk. I’ll leave you with this seven for now. Until next time.

Eddie Fews


Email me: EddieFews@WayOfThePlayer.com For 1 on 1 coaching or consultation via Skype, phone or IM.

The Eleven Female Orgasms

Did you know that women have the ability to experience eleven different forms of an orgasm? Imagine being the type of sexual lover that knows more about a woman’s body than she does. How many women know about this intense and pleasurable subject? Not many.

And we have found hundreds of women asking this same exact question. The point is, you are not the only one who is clueless in bed, and greater communication and attention for your partner’s needs will only boost her endorphins.

Simply put: she will want to do more for you as well.

We have never entertained the idea of asking a man this question; most men are honored if they have the knowledge that a woman is capable of having a orgasm at all. But of course, there exists a modest group who can claim knowledge to these esoteric methods. We know because we have learned from them. The vast majority of the male species is ignorant about their feminine bed-lusts. And the sad fact is that they are okay with this.

So what is the origin of this issue? The answer is basic, and coincidentally unexpected: men harbor an intense fear of feminine sexuality in our society.

The majority of women are only aware of two orgasms that their bodies can encounter (whether or not they have ever experienced them is another thing), and, unfortunately, this even holds true in the post-Feminist community. Ladies, looks like you’ve been cheating yourselves.

I will explain to you how this came about. You have taken back many of your rights, but you have mixed liberation with hostility.

Metrosexuality has become a fashionable word. But in fact, there are not many men available to teach women about the miracle known as the female body. Tearing men away from their masculinity has been a great success – it is great for the economy. However, women are missing out on quite a lot.

A small portion of men are good sexual lovers. Ask any woman and she will confirm this. Becoming a sexpert starts from knowing how to please her, especially knowing how to give her an orgasm. This requires going a little deeper and finding out the different ways that a woman can orgasm.

Add some love and awareness to the world of relationships and sexuality. Love dissolves fear; awareness dissolves ignorance. Let’s start with the one orgasm you probably know:

1. The Clitoral Orgasm

This orgasm results from direct contact with the clitoris. Strong feelings stem from the clitoris and send pleasurable waves throughout a woman’s entire body. A woman’s clitoris is the most sensitive area on her body – with twice as many stimulatory nerve endings as the male penis. If you are a guy, picture all of the nerve endings in the penis compacted into an area as tiny as a marble. The clitoris is so important to receiving pleasure that feelings of arousal are always felt there on some degree. That is why the clitoris is so responsive to different kinds of touch.

Although, it’s not equal for all women. The clitoris’s sensitivity can be completely opposite from woman to woman. There are the women that may prefer a lighter touch. Other women get enjoyment from a more intense stimulation. And for a portion of women, the clitoris is so delicate that contacting the clit directly is often not comfortable and can sometimes be aggravating.

After an orgasm, the clit often becomes extremely sensitive, to the point where physical contact could be painful. As a good sexual partner, you must be aware of this and grant a woman some minutes of rest before going at it again.

This kind of female orgasm can be done in a few different variations: There is oral stimulation. Ladies, if your partner is not aware of how to perform oral sex on women, still let your partner do it for you. But guide him as you would guide Stevie Wonder driving an eighteen wheeler on a dark New York City street. When using your hand, be sure to use her own natural lubrication, or a water-based lubricant. With sex toys, use lubrication as well.

A clitoral orgasm can be very intense, but many women describe it as “less deep” than others. Nevertheless, it is extremely pleasurable, and good clitoral stimulation adds much to the stagnant sex life.

2. The Vaginal Orgasm

This kind of female orgasm concerns the vaginal walls, and remains focused in either the pelvic or lower stomach areas. It can also spread upward and out depending on the intensity of the experience. The uterus, pelvic muscles, and sometimes the anus will start to contract. These contractions are strong and may even push out anything stimulating the vagina.

This kind of orgasm takes a bit of time to reach, and rhythmic thrusting is often the best way to get there. A great sexual partner will communicate with their woman to figure out which position is best for her to achieve an orgasm. And a great will partner will also try not to ejaculate before she does: “Ladies always come first.”

A good deal of women describe it to be “less intense” than clitoral stimulation, however, they do feel it a bit more “deeply.” This orgasm is felt as a pressure that slowly grows and explodes from deep inside the vagina.

3. The G-Spot Orgasm

This orgasm starts in the G-Spot and can stay there while climaxing, or it will intensely rush throughout the entire female body. When a woman is sexually aroused, the tissue around her will urethra becomes filled with blood from her paraurethral glands that produce and fill with prostatic fluid. This area on the front wall of the vagina is that same mysterious and sensitive spot: the G-Spot.

The process is actually similar to a male erection. And, a result, the urethral sponge becomes “erect.” If you touch it, it feels firm. In other words, this is a female “boner.” The only thing separating the two is that, for women, it all happens on the inside of the vagina. There are a few ways to stimulate a woman’s G-Spot. Rhythmic pushing or circular friction motions are the best for reaching this type of orgasm. Try using a special Tantric sensual massage – it tends to stimulate this section of a female’s body. This orgasm will often lead to female ejaculation.

This kind of female orgasm takes a good amount time to build up to, and many women say that it is a special, deep, intense carnal pleasure, that builds up until their whole lower abdomen and pelvic area explodes. And they are often carried away for a decent amount of time by the strong rush of euphoric energy – often fully unconscious of where they are and what is happening around them.

4. Squirting Orgasm (Female Ejaculation)

In short, this powerful orgasm is achieved by using ancient Tantric techniques. It exercises unwanted emotions and fills a woman with light, delightful energy and a feeling of happiness and peace. Squirting makes other kinds of female orgasms look meek in comparison.

This type of orgasm causes a deep bond to form between a woman and her partner. This has to be the most sensual thing a woman can experience with you.

5. The A–Spot Orgasm (The Anterior Fornix Orgasm)

This kind orgasm is reached by stimulating an area far deep in the vagina (about 7-10 cm, or 3-4”) on the front wall – the same exact wall where the G-spot is located. In other words, this is a section of delicate tissue at the inner front end of the vaginal tube, in between the cervix and the bladder.

This orgasm is most easily achieved using your hand. Use the same technique you use to stimulate the G-Spot, but in this case, go as deep as your fingers can reach. You simply just try to “scoop it out” with your fingers – a “come hither” motion. In the basic missionary position, a man should be short-thrusting while deep inside a woman during sexual intercourse.

Many women find the feeling incredibly pleasurable while others do not like it at all, so be sure to keep this in mind.

After orgasming, the A-Spot does not become sensitive like the clitoris, and you can easily continue stimulation, bringing women to new levels of pleasure. Again, communication is the key here, so make sure to ask her if she is enjoying what you are doing.

This orgasm is described by women as a type of soft burst of electricity bringing them to a sharp, erotic climax. Some women find this orgasm similar to the G-spot, while some find it closer to an extremely strong vaginal orgasm. Either way, your partner will be excited about the fact that you even know about this.

6. The Deep Spot Orgasm (The Posterior Fornix Orgasm)

This king of orgasm is reached by stimulating the section of the vagina that is positioned at the deepest part of the back wall, right before the cervix.

Direct stimulation of the deep spot will cause intense orgasms. Some ladies compare it to having anal sex. When this orgasm is performed it gives off excited responses like: “This is the first time I have ever felt like this,” or, “Wow! What’s going on!” This particular section of the vagina is not well known, so not many women have not been able to experience it. This kind of female orgasm can also be performed by using the fingers, also using “come hither” motions. Use both deep and shallow strokes, and you can even use two fingers if you’d like.

Note: First ask the woman what she feels when you touch her cervix – some women love it and others completely hate it.

7. The U-Spot Orgasm

This type of female orgasm results from stimulation along a small area of erectile tissue located just above and on either side of the urethral opening – a small section of skin in between the urethra and the vagina. If this region is gently stroked with the finger, the tongue, or the tip of the penis, there will be a powerful erotic response.

Any woman can experience any of the above listed female orgasms. However, a few more orgasms are not so common. They are:

8. The Breast Orgasm

This type of orgasm happens during a peak of stimulation toward the breasts. A woman’s nipples are connected to nerve endings in the female genitals, and a large amount of women experience a direct connection with their clitoris when their nipples are stimulated.

Many women feel increased sexual excitement when their nipples are stimulated. However, not all women can experience the breast orgasm, so this mainly depends on the sensitivity of her nipples.

9. The Oral Orgasm

This orgasm can be experienced by women who are very sensitive orally. The mouth plays a huge role in a human’s sexual nervous system. This is the reason that kissing causes arousal in both men and women. The mouth orgasm can take place during any intimate activity done orally such as kissing, licking, sucking, or performing oral sex.

It has been described by women as a feeling beginning in their lips and then rushing from the mouth to the genitals, followed by the rest of her body.

10. The Skin Orgasm

This orgasm can come about by sensually rubbing certain areas of female body that are not directly in connection with the sexual nervous system. Examples include orgasms experienced by many women during the typical massage session, face treatments at the cosmetologist, and so on.

11. The Mental Orgasm

This kind of female orgasm can happen during visual and auditory stimulation. Examples of such stimulation are movies, videos, sexual behavior exhibited in front of others, and sexually-charged talk during foreplay. Women become so turned on that they can actually experience an orgasm from excitement alone.

Eddie Fews