So You’ve Met Someone Special?

Is this your first time falling in love or has it happened before?

If this is the first time you’ve found someone special it is important that you understand that this someone special is going to come in your life again and again, and again, and again, and again. If this isn’t the first time, and you’re still referring to this someone special as “ someone special ” you’re an idiot.

Do not, and I repeat do not, give up the game just because you’ve met someone special. Settling down shouldn’t be some spontaneous decision that you make because you’ve met someone special. Settling down should only be something you do when you have been considering settling down for sometime; far before you met anyone special. When you allow a woman who is seemingly unique to cause you to change your course randomly who do you think is now leading the interaction? And how does flipping and flopping depending on who comes into your life on any given day effect your frame? Is that the frame of a leader or is that the frame of a more unstable man that blows with the wind? A man that goes wherever life takes him? Not a man that is in control, not a man who has the ability to create his own destiny. What would happen if we bought every item being offered at a “special” price at the electronic store despite having a mortgage that has to be paid? In any other aspect of our life do we let the potential of something special interfere with our priorities?

The moment you settle down before you’ve made the conscious decision to; a decision that should include a plan and a purpose, you are giving up your power. You are giving up the very thing that makes you attractive, and are potentially setting yourself up for oneitis, disappointment, and heartbreak.

Always trust you initial instinct. The feeling you get when you first meet a girl is likely going to be the most accurate description of where you should take your relationship. As guys we do that anyway; when we meet a girl we always make a note to decide mentally whether or not this girl is going to be a “ hit it and quit it, a friends with benefits, a girlfriend, a wife etc”. Now what happens when a girl that initially gave you the “hit it and quit” vibe gives you some amazing sex and so you decide to promote her to a friends with benefits spontaneously after the lay? What happens when you become even weaker after a few more ejaculations and she gets bumped to girlfriend? You get bumped to beta male in her mind. And because of your now weakened frame and you become food that will be used as emotional energy to fuel her to get the guy with a stronger frame.

We get emails from guys all the time that have had this happen to them and you know what the common theme is between them? They have all developed emotional dependence on these women and have waited until they were seconds from drowning to begin flapping their arms to call the life guard over for help.

Stick to your guns. 

If she wasn’t good enough for you in the beginning, its likely she just isn’t up to your standards. Don’t let the production of oxytocin(a bonding chemical created by cuddling, kissing, sex etc.)  influence your thoughts and cause you to take an action you had no intention of taking while your emotions were stable.

We have to be stronger than our emotions.

This will keep men from marrying prostitutes and wasting time with women who are below their standards. When a man meets a prostitute, what is likely his first thought? Whats his first instinct? To sleep with her, pay her, and leave; never to see her or talk to her again. And not that I’m advocating prostitution, but that is exactly what he should do. He should stick to his plan, a plan that likely wasn’t deluded by emotional manipulation when it was created.

Do not.. And I repeat do not give up the game until you’ve made that conscious and well thought out decision that you are ready. A decision that should have came LONG before you met “someone special”.

Develop a plan, decide what you want to do, and stick to it. Be a man. Stop being lead by emotions and affection from women. Your first thought is almost always the most accurate one.

Now, for the guys who are ready to settle down and the guys who are far too undeveloped in their game to heed to this advice; give every woman you consider settling down with a 90 day probation before you make the decision to commit to them. Women that are bad for you will likely blow themselves out in 90 days or less.

If she starts pressuring you to commit to her before that 90 days, just hold firm or let her walk if she is incapable of doing so. All women will put on a show initially, its the mating dance, its the act to get you to commit. Once they have that commitment the mask comes off and you are now dealing with the very thing that gave you that initial gut feeling in the first place.

Its just like the girl who’s place is always clean when you first meet them. The girl that eventually starts leaving dishes around and before you know it, her place is a complete mess every time you come over.

Trust your gut. I can’t say my gut has always been right, but it has been right 95% of the time and those are odds that I have to take. I’m not going to let the potential fantasy of some hollywood romance movie interfere with me takin charge and being the leader of my own life.

Men, do yourselves a favor.. Stop being taken by love. Ask yourself why do you want to be in a relationship? For what purpose. What can a relationship offer you at this point of your life that a friends with benefits can’t? And if you can’t come up with anything good enough; you aren’t ready to be in a relationship. You’re just doing it because you think its what you’re suppose to do. Men are jumping in relationships with women everyday now that are offering nothing. I would hope that after a woman pressures you to escalate your situationship into a relationship that something new would come with the offer. She gets the commitment she wants, but what do you get? 9 times out of 10 in todays time you’ll get absolutely nothing.

There was a time in which women withheld on sex, affection, and full submission until after they received commitment, but that time is not today. When will we stop buying cows that are already offering us the milk for free?

Be the leader. Stop following feelings. Leave that to the more feminine in nature.

Peace & Love

Eddie Fews


For One on One Coaching and Consultations via Skype, Phone, or Instant Messenger; Email: EddieFews@Gmail.com

Buy The Book: The Secret Laws of Social Wisdom: Click Here 

Going Through A Break Up? Read This Now – Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

Going Through A Break Up? Read This Now

The holidays just seem to be the time in which everyone decides to save money on gift buying and break up with their partners and as a result I’ve gotten a share of emails asking about getting back with ex girlfriends, dealing with heart break, etc. I decided I would make a public post about the question and stories I’ve bene hearing and the way I responded. Every guy going through it seems to think that their girlfriend was the “special” one, and while that may be partially true; the full truth is that there is something special about everyone of these women. No one is more special than the other. Its just the feeling of loss mixed with the feelings of “wanting what you can’t have” that causes men to romanticize over women who probably meant absolutely nothing to the last couple guys that walked in and out of their life.

I often wonder how a man with high self esteem and pride could feel comfortable dating a girl who had let men walk all over them just months before meeting you. Wheres your dignity? Surely if the last guy treated her like dirt and she allowed it you don’t want to be the one to roll out the red carpet.. or do you? But you know what they say.. “ One mans trash is another mans treasure”. I find myself curious about how the women I’m dating let guys treat them in the past. When you feel you are deserving of the best you kind of don’t wanna settle for a woman who didn’t know her worth until she was inspired by the love you began to give her. I’ll be the first to admit that I have made this mistake a couple times, but after the first I was always quick to snap out of it. There is a well of women out here; a well of amazing women. As I am writing this there is beautiful barista working behind the counter at the cafe I’m sitting at. She has no real shape, no ass, average sized breast, but her face is gorgeous and she carries herself with such grace and elegance. Not to mention I was out with an amazing woman last night; theres just so many. I repeat phrases like “ theres so many great women” because i really want the readers to get it. If you’re heart broken, cry it out but get over it. The moment you wipe the water clouding your vision you’ll notice all the great women you’re surrounded by.

I saw a study recently in which a scientist created a test group of 20 strangers – ten male, ten female and paired them up facing each other while sitting at tables. They were to stare each other in the eyes while reading romantic poetry and repeating phrases like “ I love you” and “ I want to spend my life with you”. The study went on for 8 hours.. And you know what happen? When it was done three out of the ten couples got married and four of the remaining seven couples began seeing each other after the study. So what does that tell us? What we know to be love is truthfully something we coax ourselves into being in when we find someone who we feel is attractive enough (whether internally, externally or both), that we happen to begin seeing consistently.

It is our own thoughts, it is the things we say to ourselves about the partner while they’re not around that slowly but surely fills us with the chemical reaction we know to be infatuation. I fall in love easily, I always have, because I enjoy it. I enjoy the emotions, I enjoy the rush, the inspiration; I even enjoy the momentary pain once its all said and done. Its all creative fuel for me. I use for creativity. I fall in love because it is part of my purpose in life to, however i’m always completely aware that this is ME thats making all of this happen. There is no special girl necessarily; but there is special thoughts of my own creation. And i then use those same thoughts to rise on above and beyond it. If you’ve fell in love once you can fall in love again. Its simply a matter of teaching yourself too; and like anything else – with practice comes perfection.

Anyway; I’ll get to a couple pieces of advice that I gave out recently on men dealing with heartbreak. I’m sure the majority of the stories out there aren’t too different than these.

From: JMW

Subject: Stressed over a girl I was seeing. Fix or move on?

Message:I’ll try to summarize this the best I can.

About 3 months ago, I met a girl through some friends. Every person I met said the same thing, “She’s sweet, beautiful, fun, and I think you 2 would get along great”. So I decided to meet her in a group setting and they were right, we really hit it off. We dated for a couple months and she was VERY interested me. She kept asking our mutual friend if I liked her, she texted me everyday from the day we met at least once if nothing else than to say goodnight. First time we slept together, she beat around the bush for 2 hours basically inviting herself over. We had an incredible time every time we were together.

The last time I saw her she came to my house, we cooked, watched a movie, etc. We were supposed to hang out a couple days later but she cancelled on me because she forgot she had plans with friends. I hate when people break commitments but I didn’t address it via text and things had been going so well I didn’t want to make a mountain out of a molehill. After that day, she quit texting me except for when I texted her first, but she would respond immediately to my texts. We would talk for 2 hours but then when I’d invite her over or ask her out, she would beat around the bush with bs excuses.

So after about 10 days of this, I confronted her about it basically saying wtf but in a more polite and professional manner. She said said I had been super sweet to her (my first mistake, I know) and that she thought I was looking for something serious and she wasn’t ready for that blah blah etc. I have no idea why she thought that because AFAIK I had done nothing to indicate it. A few days went by and our mutual friend called me and said she told them that when she was cooking, I walked up behind her and gave her a hug and she thought it was moving too fast. I guess I’m just batshit for thinking you can hug a girl 3 weeks after you’ve been sleeping together.

It has been driving me bonkers because she was perfect for what I like. I’ve had gf’s for 2+ years that I missed less than her. So the same mutual friend called me yesterday and said she had been talking about me to them and on one hand trying to make me sound like the bad guy but on the other hand still acting interested in seeing me. 2 of our friends told me they think she started to catch feelings, it freaked her out, so she bailed.

Sorry this was so lengthy, but I haven’t slept in 2 weeks and am trying to find the solution. What would you recommend? I made the mistake of being very nice and accommodating because I had convinced myself “she was different” and would appreciate it which she acted like she did.

Can I/should I try to salvage this or move on and try to forget about it?

My Response: First things first bro..

Here me once and here my clear.

CLOSURE is for BITCHES and bitches only.

Life ain’t fair and you aren’t always going to get closure. And the fact that you’re struggling to move on without getting it is a reflection of why she isn’t around to begin with. Its weak and is a reflection of you not being able to stand on your own two feet(not secure, women want a secure man) without the assistance of information from another.

Second.. Everybody gets GOT bro, its all apart of the game. Like my dad(former super player) told me after I got broken up with and left the first time.. ” You ain’t a player until you get played son”.

Two things can happen when you have such an experience; you can become bitter or you can become better. This shit should only fuel you because of the knowledge, wisdom, and understanding you’re going to gain from having this experience.

Also, let me ask. Why on earth would you want to be a relationship because YOU want to be in one? Don’t you understand how girly that is? She was already fucking you, she was already crashing and cooking food with you.. Why would you want to hand over your freedom as if you were going to get something in exchange for doing so? Its a bad deal.

Now if she wasn’t fucking you or doing all the girlfriend shit and said ” I only fuck and cook with guys who decide to be my boyfriend and stop fucking other women” I could understand you wanting to be in a relationship because then AT LEAST there is a REASON. You get to cook and fuck the girl granted you give her your freedom.

The mindset that pushes a guy to want to be in a relationship off of his own decision is an INSTANT oneitis mindset. That would only suggest that oneitis, is but a couple months away. You’ll have your 1-4 months of fun, but after that its all set and done.

So if I could give you any advice right now I would tell you to cry your eyes out, play a bunch of sick love drunk love songs ” The Script” has a great album called Breakeven I think. I balled my eyes out to that when I lost my first love after being a pimp all my life before then. And once you’re spend a couple weeks crying and sulking you build yourself back up into a stronger better man, worthy of attracting a higher quality woman because of the wisdom you gained from this experience.

You’ll fall in love again, believe that.. I’ve been in love 9 times almost; its a choice, you talk yourself into falling in love. You’re poison your thoughts day by day little by little until you’re on your death bed.

You will be straight man, I promise you that. You may have a couple months of recovery but after that you will not remember this girl existed. Well you may, but she’ll be a faint memory. And it won’t be a big deal.

I live in NYC and I’ve lost some of the greatest women by societal standards that this country has to offer. You think you’ll never meet another for a while, but you always do. A player will always snap back into position and get back on his shit.

Now what you don’t want to do is contact her. Please do not contact her. PLEASE. It will be of no use.

If you want her back – which you probably won’t if you really do what you’re supposed to, when she contacts you IGNORE HER the first time and respond the second time she reaches out. THIS SHIT NEVER FAILS.. TRUST ME.. There are no unique situations. I don’t give two shits what the text or voicemail says, let her contact you at least twice before you respond. The first text is always spontaneous, the second and third will reveal her true feelings. If you don’t want her back then of course just ignore her all together and just carry on with life.

So just hold out, cry, and rebuild. And when she contacts you IGNORE the first text and then respond to the second or third one.

It make take a couple days for her to send a second text, but she will.. THEY ALWAYS DO. There are no female exceptions to the rule; no matter how great you thought or think she is. We’re animals, creatures of habits and NO ONE is above human nature.

You’re but a few short months away from being the best version of yourself you’ve ever been. Sulk for a bit, but find a way to be EXCITED. Its gets better man. It does get better. Weather this storm and then enjoy your new life.

JMW: Thanks for the lengthy response Eddie!

Deep down I know you’re correct and I guess the 2 biggest things that are driving me crazy are:

1. I haven’t figured out what I’ve learned just yet. I like having a building block to work off of and a failure knowing where I went wrong so I can improve next time.

2. Before I even agreed to meet her, some people I’ve known for years and trust their opinion, told me how great of a girl she was and sweet and innocent and whatever. I’m not sure whether we all misread her or whether something changed.

I honestly wasn’t looking for a relationship or trying to change anything. I was pleased with how things were and never once mentioned a relationship or being exclusive or any of that. We saw each other a couple times a week for food, sex, fun shit and that’s perfect for me. It gives me time to do my own shit while still having a cool chick around on occasion. Even at the time, I didn’t realize it would bother me as much as it has if things didn’t work out. And like I said, more than anything I just want to know wtf happened.

I’ve had similar situations in the past and didn’t give a damn. I’ve heard the PUA talk of oneitis for years, but assumed I was too heartless to understand. Overall, I don’t much care for it. Hell I can’t even say I’ve ever been in love. Usually when things end, we part ways, it’s a chapter to close, and I search for something else. For some damn reason this one has me all messed up in the head.

I’ve held out this long without contacting her and general consensus is that she will reach out again at some point. Maybe I’ll just continue to wait it out and see what happens.

Thanks again, you are awesome and I’d probably be lost had I never discovered this industry

My Response: You’re not always going to know man. Because you CARE to KNOW is the root of your oneitis. I’m sure you could give two shits about the starting at finishing point of exactly where things went from with some of the women you parted with in the past. It just didn’t matter to you. As it doesn’t matter to many of us; unless it’s a girl we’ve developed oneitis for.

And women are never listening to the shit we say nor do they care so much for the things we do. What they care about is the place and position our words and actions are coming from. So you don’t have to say ” I want to be with you for the rest of my life” to give off the ” I want to be with you for the rest of my life” energy and vibe. Its implied subtly.

The thing men don’t understand about women is that women speak a language that many men don’t understand; its a language of hints. They speak it with each other and because it comes so natural to them they assume WE speak it too. But we don’t..And this is why women think guys are “dumb”.. We only know one language; and don’t understand that most obvious words and interpretations of the language they naturally think ALL people speak.

So a woman is reading into the language that you speak that you don’t even know that you speak if that makes any sense. So she communicates back to you in that lingo hoping you’re paying enough attention to make adjustments when she responds to make adjustments. You cared too much; regardless of what you may think – hence the reason you are here. The fact that you are posting on this forum about her shows you had oneitis for her that she picked up on in language number two. It may not of been blatant to you because of your natural male insensitivity but it was obvious to her, hence the reason she took off.

You just have to accept that. Regardless of what you may think; her telling you this from her own mouth (which she did in chick language already) isn’t going to make you feel any better. What you are asking for is for her to be a GUY and tell you clearly and plainly exactly why she behaved the way she did and unfortunately women just don’t operate like that. You have to take this one like the champ you are and keep it moving.

You can’t except a dog to meow man, even if it’ll make you feel better. Dogs just don’t meow. And chicks just don’t explain in the language that men want them to how and why things took the turn they did.

Accept it and rise man. Everyone takes a loss.

I got GOT at one of the most pimp moments of my life. I was seeing loads of chicks all the time; and one girl got me. So no ones exempt. And never think you’re above the BROKEN heart. Because once you think you are; it’ll be waiting for you right around the corner to remind you that human nature is still intact.

It’ll be tougher now for sure, because you will have built up stronger walls against it; which only means that you will be attracting higher quality women now because of your new found resistance. So don’t worry and be happy *Bob Marly voice*

Be open about it to bro. Don’t be afraid to wear that shit with a smile. People respect transparency and you’ll be surprised how many women want to fuck you out of sympathy because of it. So long as you’re not trying to pose like you’re some big macho unfeeling man after the break up. Most of the sympathy pussy won’t hang around for too long, but they’ll still be there to comfort you at moments through this. And you’re not going to cry to them of course; you’re going to just accept the fact that you’re in remodeling mode and you’re going to smile through it.

And no problem man. I’m in a good mood and so I’m writing a lot. You caught me at the right time.

JMW: I’ll be damned. I came looking for some advice and words of encouragement and it actually went better than I had hoped for.

For the past couple weeks I’ve been trying to figure out what the hell I did wrong so I can improve it and move on. Being a guy who hates bullshit, I’d rather have it spelled out as blatantly as possible right in front of my face and take out the guess work. That didn’t happen this time. But after talking with you and having some time to think, I see the mistakes I made and can learn from them now.Most of the time, if a 2 month “relationship” ends I don’t give a shit and that’s why they usually don’t end because the girl detects that I wouldn’t give a shit and keeps trying to “win me over”. Since she came to me so highly reviewed through friends, I let my guard down and caught feelings too soon because I wasn’t making her prove she was worthy. While I never said it or directly showed it, she could just tell I guess. Hell I didn’t even realize at the time I gave this much of a damn but she did. I definitely fucked a couple things up and now I finally see what they were. Hell I even cancelled another date after I met this girl because things went so well (and I got the flu).
Thanks again for all the help. I’m glad I caught you in a good mood because it may just be what gets me out of this damn funk I’ve been in.
From: DM

Subject: Need your expert advice man please!!! (break up)

Message: So my gf of one and a half years just broke up with me. She said she isn’t happy, that we havent been doing well for a long time and that “She loves me, but isn’t in love with me” (whatever that means).. Anyways, we have had problems in our relationship, but i didn’t think that the gravity of which would culminate in this kind of breakup. We talked, and asked her to work it out saying i could change, be the person she needed to give it a chance, but she was having none of it. I know what it seems like, ive been devastated, but i still love this girl, and am not ready to walk away from such a long relationship without a fight. Ive read different places that the only and best way to get back an ex is to go into radio silence for a month and just work on yourself. How should I go about this, i love this girl with all my heart and would give anything to work things out. Im a fucking wreck, but she doesn’t seem to be too distraught (as she put it she’s ‘numb’ to me). What is a way that i can get out of this and at least have a shot at getting back with her. I know i made the mistake of trying to convince her to try it, but we had had fights before and BAM we were in each others arms again. I need some advice on how to make this relationship work again, and not have people tell me to move on, find other fish in the sea etc.. I need help with this one please!

Thanks and i look forward to your response.

My Response: “i love this girl with all my heart and would give anything to work things out. Im a fucking wreck”

This quote here is the sole reason your girl left you. You care about her more than you care about yourself and because of it you’ve become a burden. You’ve become a weight on her shoulders and this is why she now resents you. You’re draining her. You’re free loading off of the energy she brings into your life. Who wouldn’t be numb to a free loader? She’s lost respect for you because you’ve put her desires too far before your own. And once a woman loses respect for you; her love for you goes right out the window. It happens to the best of us so don’t be so hard on yourself. But you must fucking chill. Any action you take from the mindset that you are currently in is going to push her further away from you than she is now. If you make absolutely ZERO attempts to reach out to her again she WILL come back when you least expect it. But remember I said ZERO! So before you do something stupid like send her a 500 word text or give her a call remember that the action will ruin the 100% guarantee that she WILL return if and ONLY if you make ZERO attempts to contact her again.

Every attempt at contact after that point reduces the chances of her returning by 50%.. But as long as you do NOT, you have a 100% chance that she will return. I swear to you before God.. No woman is special and they all do the same shit.

Work Out, read books, and go hang out with buddies. It’s tough to read with a broken heart i know. Its tough to work out with a broken heart also, but you must power yourself through it man. Its the only way. Just power yourself through making improvements and SHE WILL return when you least expect it.

From: EnKay

Subject: Need and urgent reply!! I Don’t wanna lose her. ( Break up )

Message: Been dating a girl since november. Had a great start. Havent seen her in 5 weeks. Issues at work etc. ive lost my job and havent been myself. Neither had she. Had a bit if distance. Sent flowers to her for valentines day last week, thiught to restart this. We set tomorrow for a date. Been really excited. Then she sent this:

“I tried calling earlier, I’m putting dating on a hold at the minute, not sure what i want. I don’t want to mess you around so thought I would let you know”

How do i respond??

I need your help please?

My Response: Why would you wanna date a girl if your life is currently a mess? Cut it out bro. Don’t you know that if you’re a mess you will only make the life of another a mess? Why fuck up someone else life just because you’re currently lonely? Get your shit together first bro. These chicks ain’t going NO WHERE. You only want her because its appearing that you can’t have her. TRUST ME. If you had her, you wound’t even want her like you do now. You’re listening to the chemicals reactions in your body that are all created from YOUR OWN thoughts and not the honest logic. Fuck her bro.. Not literary.. Like forget her.. Go on with your life. She’ll come chasing you if you do, but as long as you stay obsessed with her mentally, she’ll know intuitively and want nothing to do with you. Women intuition is 10x stronger than ours – we can’t even imagine what this is like. You have to live your life as if everyone is always watching because they are. If you wouldn’t post on the forums about her with her knowing; don’t do the shit thinking that she won’t know. She’ll feel it. Its a topic I cover in my book.

Behave the way you would behave if you had a camera following you everywhere you go linked directly to her television screen and she was watching your every move. Because she kinda is and this will all impact the way she thinks about you when you’re not around. Life is a feeling process. We pick up vibes.. women just pick them shits up stronger. Grow man.. Grow tall and let go. She’ll love you for it.

But whatever you do.. DO NOT HIT HER UP! its the worst thing you can do. And she’ll feel less attraction for you and push you further away.

Peace.

Eddie Fews


For One on One Coaching and Consultations via Skype, Phone, or Instant Messenger; Email: EddieFews@gmail.com

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Give Credence To The Support Of A Woman

I was sitting inside of my uncles awning office earlier and I had begun thinking about my weekend. It was one of my close friends birthday this weekend and although I didn’t feel like going out; I had to go out and get him wasted like I promised.

So here I am – the guy that doesn’t drink, out with a bunch of old friends while they pre-game. We’re laughing, joking, and eventually we end up at The Woods in Williamsburg Brooklyn. I’m doing the usual lookout for attractive women, and the girl next to me is “accidentally ” rubbing her breast against my arm. I pay it no mind initially, so she leans over into me and says ” What’s going through your mind right now “. I’m like ” I’m just enjoying the moment.. What is your name”. She lets me know her name, we shake hands, and after a bit of small talk her boyfriend walks over to save his relationship. I introduce myself to him and then head off to buy my friend a few more drinks before I head out of here.

I get the drinks, hang out for a bit and then on my way to the door I spot a beautiful girl in a white dress. She’s walking right by me and on instinct I gently grab her wrist as to say ” Hey slow down.. I’m falling for you “. She turns, we lock eye contact, and for a moment it almost feels like we know each other. There was a full eight seconds spent in pure silence before either of us said anything. Eventually she smiled and I just went in to hug her. She introduced herself in this beautiful English accent all while telling me that she won’t be in the country for much longer. My mind began to scramble  and disappointment was creeping in so I ask her to come with me. She frowned and apologized for not being able to. I go for the number, but she has no working phone in America. She says she’ll add me on Facebook as I reluctantly let her go and make my way to the door.

Right before I reach the exit I spot another cute girl in a turquoise dress sitting at the corner of the bar. I walk on over to her, throw my arm around her shoulder and say ” Hey, I’m headed out, but your super hot; so this is me asking for your number ” She looks at my eyes suspiciously looking for any signs that she can trust me in there and  says ” What’s your name”. I say ” Eddie ” and I smile. She gives me that ‘you’re lucky you’re cute ‘ look an says ” okay I’ll give you my number “. I get the number, we talk for another minute and then I head home.

  The next day around six in the evening I text the girl wearing the turquoise dress.

Me: ” You going out tonight? “

Her: ” How and where did we meet again? I’m sorry I don’t really remember “

Me: “Lol last night.. You were sitting at the bar. I walked over, threw my arm around you, and got you number before I left “

Her: ” Haha I don’t remember at all. A lot of people were throwing their arms!” 

Me: ” Can you blame them? You were looking all fiiiinnnnnnnnneeee “

Her: ” Lol would you mine sending me a photo to refresh my memory ” 

Me: ( I sent her my facebook)

Her:” I was planning on catching a bus to go to providence at 10:30pm since I’m getting bored here. Would you like to meet up for dinner before?”

At this point I call her and boy was she’s cool. It turns out that she was visiting a friend of hers in NYC and had to leave this very night. I explain to her that there’s no need to go to back to providence just yet. I tell her she can stay with me and head back home in the morning. We go back and forth for a bit and then she agrees. I text her my address and she texts me to remind me that she’s over 6 feet tall before she comes. I chuckled… Awesome!

When she gets in my place, naturally her defenses were up. She was a little standoffish and aloof; what I believe was a challenge to the confidence I displayed over the phone. I felt the energy as soon as she walked in the room, but this is my apartment so I’m cool. At the end of the day, if I was smooth enough to get  her to come , I can get her to come again. Ya feel me? 🙂

So she tells me she’s hungry, as she did on the phone.  So I head to my kitchen to see if I have any food. There was nothing that wouldn’t take over 30 mins to cook. But no worries, I figure I’ll just order her something from GrubHub.

On the way back to my laptop to log onto GH, I see her on sitting on my sofa with my computer in her lap. I walk on over to her and as she feels me near she looks up with wide eyes and says ” YOU’RE HITCH!? “

  I smile, snatch my computer from her and say ” who said you could look through my stuff? “

She repeats the question from before, but calmer this time around.

I reply ” yes “

She tests me immediately ” so what are you going to do when this doesn’t work out? “

I laughed an said ” I’m actually doing okay”

I let her go through the stuff she was looking at. After reading my testimonials, she started to relax a bit. She realized that I wasn’t what she thought. 

She’s one of those girls that hear about pick up lines and say things like ” that would never work on me “.

And here she was, square in my living room with one of the guys who teaches the ” that would never work me” material.

She asks me a million questions, I order her food, and put on Don Jon when the food arrives. At this point we’re having a little small talk during the movie; an since the movies about porn it was natural that our conversation would transition into sex. Halfway through the movie, I suggest we watch the rest in my bed. She agrees and off we go. While in my bed I honestly wanted to turn the movie off and get to making out. I could tell she wanted to do the same, but for whatever reason I decide to suffer through it; just so I can ” finish what I start”(whatever that means).   Once the movies over she turns over an faces the wall and I’m laying there like 0_o.

I give it  about two minutes just to see if she makes a move that would suggest that she’s ready to go at it.. 

*Two Minutes later* 

  She’s laying there still – not moving. 

So I reach an lightly pull on her shoulder; suggesting her to turn around and she turns around instantly. Now we’re making out, and she’s awesome at it. Soft lips; and she knows exactly what to do with her hands during the process… I’m in heaven… I touch her everywhere I want an she shows no resistance. She’s into me; and i’m into her.

Hooking up with tall women has been a bit awkward for me in the past; but this one knows exactly what she’s doing. I don’t even look at tall women the same anymore. I tell her all of this by the way; and she’s pleased she gets to set the tone for all of the tall women I may decide to encounter in the future.

I’m constantly praising the women I’m with; and their praising me as a result. It’s like we’re playing this ” I bet I can raise your confidence more than you can raise mine ” game. It’s competitive and a win- win for the both of us.

I started loving this girl.. it was weird.

So as the story continues – unfortunately, but maybe fortunately I didn’t have a condom… We each thought about it not using one, but you know.. shit gets real out here.

I like to think that us not having sex, kept a certain level of desire between us for each other. And when there’s women out there having that “desire” for you, it’s energy that adds to your overall vibe. Girls can feel a guy who is desired by women; so the more you have women as a whole desiring you, the more they’ll feel that energy coming off of you – vice versa.

When you have sex and ejaculate most of the time there is this depleted feeling. Its almost as if you’re ejaculating all of the emotions you had for the girl prior right out of your penis.  And all desire for you have for them leaves; which eventually leads to the desire they have for you leaving. Women love men that love women – women desire men who desire women. Although, when you’re working with injaculation that desire remains, but injaculation is  hit or miss for me; it’s something i’m still working on.

Anyways..

We made out and touched each other the whole night.. I made her squirt with my fingers a couple times and then she warned me that if I continue I would be needing a new bed. I decided to take her advice on that one. I’ve had those experiences in the past, and it does make sleeping difficult. So after a bit more; we cuddle it out until the morning. She wakes up thankful, I wake up thankful and we talk a bit, before I call her cab so she could head back to Rhode Island.

Before she goes, I ask her when she’ll be in New York again, and  she informs me that she’s moving in two weeks to become a teacher in Hawaii. Naturally we have to let it go; and before she walked out the door, the look she gave me and the look I gave her suggested that if we ever saw each other again it would be on.

She entered the taxi, drove away, and I thought about taking a trip to Hawaii…

1024px-Pokai_Bucht_auf_Oahu

Moral Of The Story: 

I selected this story because even after this day; me and this girl still maintain a decent level of rapport over a distance. It’s always nice to have women texting you just to let you know you’re still on their mind and that you’re awesome. 

This girl in particular texted me to “thank me” a few days later; and i’m the one that thought I should be thanking her. I was good to her though; I was kind and generous, and because of this she is always going to be sending positive energy my way – which will fuel the “good karma/good luck” that will be coming into my life. We should begin to see all the people who come into our lives as opportunities to be add value to the life of another in whatever way we can. That energy always comes back around to assist us when we need it. When I was younger and less self aware; I would sleep with women and call them cabs the same night. I was cold and women could feel that energy coming off of me. It made attracting the highest of quality women more of a challenge. Now these same women flock to me a bit more than they used to. It’s a woman’s intuition;I read somewhere that female intuition is fifteen times stronger than a male intuition. We get physical strength and they’re a bit more psychic than we are; instinctively women just know when we aren’t being genuine. Its not like they hear a clear voice in their heads about it; alarms just go off and they slowly but surely begin losing attraction for the violater. I know it sounds like some “spooky” hogwash, but this is real – ask any other guy that does halfway decent with women.

Women are people; they have souls and if you’re going to have a sexual experience with them; treat them like it. 

Just take a look at the world we live in today. Seventy percent of all music is bought by women, seventy percent of clothing, concert tickets, books, shoes, etc is all bought by women. So who is it that are actually supporters of the world? If you had to align yourself with a support system; which group would be better to align yourself with? Men or women? You know how it goes; the man makes the money and the woman spends his money.

Guys have this “bro’s over hoes” mentality and I do agree with it on some level. Don’t let some new girl walk into your life and destroy a friendship, but there is a level in which this doesn’t apply. It is for this reason that I do business with men and spend leisure time with women. Now of course I have my brothers, but more off then not you’ll find me hanging out with women.

Men tend to get jealous of each other and the ego begins to run its course. We see each other as competition. So we don’t buy each others music as much, we don’t buy each others books, clothes, etc. because we’re looking for people to buy ours. Now if we only knew that if they bought others music more, others would buy our music more things would change. And thats a whole different topic for a different time, but this is something women understand. Which is part of the reason it looks like they’re taking over the planet.

Instinctively women don’t see men as their competition, so it’s much easier for a woman to show their support to a man than it is for a man to do the same.

Let take wildlife in nature for example. How often do you see male animals hanging out with other male animals? 

You see one lion and 4-5 lionesses. 

One rooster and fifteen hens. 

One bull and ten cows. 

800px-Pride_leader

Nature sets the example; so I believe it is wise to align ourselves with more women. The support they offer is unparalleled to the majority of the support you’re going to get from any man .  And There’s nothing wrong with getting laid, but when you do, be kind. Lay there with them the extra thirty minutes even when you don’t want to. You’ll probably want to have sex again after that time is up anyway. But even if you don’t, they’ll appreciate that extra time. And the support they offer you will be well worth it. Thats something you can’t buy. 

 If i’ve ever learned anything from dealing with the opposite sex; I’ve learned that you can never out give a woman. There’s a level of selflessness within them that allows them behave in this manner; whether that be for positive or negativity. That old bible verse cliche ” Hell hath no fury like a woman’s scorn” has been perpetuated through society for a reason.   

 Now this write does apply to men as well as it applies to men; I’ve just advising that we be a bit more conscious when dealing with women. And in no way am I encouraging you to take shit for anyone; women included. Know your boundaries and hold everyone else to them, but as long as people are operating within them there is no reason not to be kind. Be sexual, be assertive, and be confident, but most important of all.. Be KIND. 

Peace & Love

Eddie Fews


For One on One Coaching and Consultations via Skype, Phone, or Instant Messenger; Email: EddieFews@gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: The Secret Laws of Social Wisdom’ Click Here 

The Power In A Proper Compliment

There has been a myth going around the seduction community for some time that you should never compliment a woman on her looks. That instead you should point out something unique that a guy doesn’t usually compliment her on to get her attention. While I agree that an indirect compliment will definitely lift a woman’s spirits, I can’t help but laugh at the guys who are afraid to acknowledge a woman’s beauty. And I won’t even bother addressing the men who think they have to NEG – say something negative to knock an attractive woman off her high horse just to get her attention. I would only advise the men on that level of social immaturity to get a horse of their own before they even think about connecting with the opposite sex. But back to the subject at hand..

I believe that a proper compliment based solely off of a woman’s looks is the best way to connect with her. Women carry purses that are usually filled with items to touch up their appearance( make up, mirrors, etc.) which only suggest that they worry about what they look like a lot more than men do. What better way to ease the mind of a woman than to let her know that she doesn’t have to worry about how she is begin perceived at that moment. Having put her mind at ease, she can now contemplate other matters.. perhaps even.. YOU?

Now there is a catch..

The compliment certainly has to be unique and more than unique it has to be genuine. A compliment such as “ You’re beautiful/sexy/hot/cute/pretty” is unreacted to for several reasons.

Reason #1

It’s obvious-She hears this ALL the time.

Reason #2

When you say “ You’re beautiful” you are stating it as if it is a fact. While YOU may perceive her as beautiful she may be the complete opposite to someone else. Now although she may hear the word beautiful all the time; changing “ You’re beautiful “ to “ I THINK you are beautiful “ will get you a completely different reaction – I guarantee it.

Reason #3

There is no YOU in this compliment. What more is she supposed to say other than “ Thank You ” while walking away. Exactly how do the men that walk around calling women “hot” expect them to respond? Did you think they will lean into you and start making out with you? Grab your hand, take out a pen, and write their phone number on it? In what reality does this happen and why is it that the urban man sits around waiting for miracles instead of making them happen. This is your life; waiting will only get you what waiting has already gotten you.. Which is what?

Women wear tight dresses, high heels, and even walk the way they do because they WANT to be viewed as attractive. They want some guy to be confident enough in both himself and her to compliment her beauty without fear. So compliment her beauty relentlessly, do so with passion, high energy and she’ll love for you it.

The trick to successfully complimenting a woman’s looks is to state how the way she looks is making YOU feel. She doesn’t want to know she is attractive as much as she wants to know how much her attractiveness is affecting YOU. This is about YOU, this isn’t about her looking a certain way; it’s about her beauty filling YOU with fire and desire from the inside out. No woman can resist a man confident enough to express how tempted he is to give into weakness because of her beauty.

I’ll give you an example..

Back when I experimented with the online dating thing, I realized that all men would do is compliment a woman on her looks and the women hated it. Why? Because they weren’t doing it the proper way. They would all say “ Hey Beautiful, Hey sexy, you’re hot etc. “. Now as you stated before, they could of received more responses if they said “ I think you’re sexy, I think you’re hot etc “, but I decided to take a different approach. I was going to describe in one or two lines how the way a woman looked was making me feel. I never had to read profiles.. I would just monitor my emotions while looking at their pictures and just describe this to them.

One of my favorite lines was “ damn girl..you make me wanna knit the both of us matching sweaters.“

I could send that to ten girls and get seven responses, because I was stating how the way she looked was making me FEEL.

A proper compliment tailored to a woman’s looks also does something powerful for your benefit. Not only will paying a woman a proper compliment heighten the way she perceives herself, but it will also heighten the way she perceives you. We’ve all heard the expression “ It takes one to know one “ and people are only mirrors of ourselves after all. When you comment to a person on anything they subconsciously think it must have something to do with you. So by validating her attractiveness you are also validating your own.

I used to date this girl named Natalia, and boy was she BEAUTIFUL… But she wasn’t always that way. Natalia was my next door neighbor when I lived in the suburbs. And before we were together I would see her from time to time, but I never really thought anything of her. Then one day I had a friend over who came into my house excited saying he had no idea I had such a sexy neighbor. He was also wondering why I had never made a move on her. I told him I didn’t think she was all that cute, and he told me I was crazy. So immaturely I said to myself “ Fine, I’m just going to sleep with her to score some cool points with my boy; not to mention, the idea of sleeping with a next door neighbor is a bit exciting.”

The next day I looked her up on facebook ( we went to high school together, she was three years older) and sent her a message:

Me: Hey, there’s this cute girl that lives in my neighbor hood.. You know her?

Her: (I don’t remember what she said but it was something like..) Haha yeah that’s me 🙂

Me: Dope.. So can I borrow some sugar?

Her: Sure 😉

I think she thought I was joking, but I went right on over, knocked on her door and asked for sugar. She laughed, we talked for a bit and then we exchanged phone numbers. The whole time I am thinking “ This girl is not all that attractive -I’m not even sure I want to go through with this “. But I was on a mission and I was going to complete it. I called her a couple days later, chatted with her for 20 minutes and then invited her over for a back yard picnic. So there we were, hanging out in my backyard, me still thinking she’s not that cute, and then it all started… She went into a mind state where she began describing to me how attractive I was for about fifteen minutes. She had been in a metaphorical cocoon and once the compliments began to rain, she broke out and emerged as a butterfly. My eyes glazed over and I was hers. I ate it up and for the first time since I had seen her I began to view her as all of the things she was telling me I was.

“ Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” – General Lew Wallace

“ A pimple turns to a dimple when you’re in love” – Japanese Proverb

Long story short

I fell more in love with Natalia that I’ve ever fallen for any woman in my entire life, all because she made a habit of constantly telling me how amazing I was. And as I stated above; subconsciously I would associate all of these great things with her even though my original opinions of her were negative. Her opinions of me, became my opinions of her and she knew this. I had fallen for her, I became emotional over her, and she began looking for a new male the conquer with her silver forked tongue.

There is a lot of power in the compliment and we must also realize that the more compliments we give out to others the more compliments we get in return. Compliments boost both someone else’s confidence and our own so it’s a win-win situation. Just make sure they’re genuine, original and tailed directly to the person. “I like your dress” doesn’t cut it; it’s cliche and heard by someone somewhere every single day. Try “ That dress goes great with the tone of your skin, how did you know to pick that color? “ That’ll open up the person and get the conversation flowing, but just remember that it has to be honest and genuine. If you love women enough, this will all be easy for you. Just begin expressing to them how much you really do LOVE specific things about them and how these things are making you FEEL.

Eddie Fews


For One on One Coaching and Consultations via Skype, Phone, or Instant Messenger; Email: EddieFews@gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: The Secret Laws of Social Wisdom’ Click Here 

Was Jesus Christ An Alpha Male?

What is An Alpha Male?

This is one of the most common topics within the Pick Up Artist community that I find when I’m on boards and forums dishing out advice. Every guy is trying to figure out how to behave like or how to become an alpha male. The latest post just happened to be “ Was Jesus Christ an Alpha Male ?”. I chuckled and began reading a few of the responses on the board. The poster that the majority of the board agreed with said something along the lines of “ Would an Alpha Male ‘Turn the other cheek?” which is a reference to – Mathew Chapter 5 Verse 39: but I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. I’m guessing the murderous action hero from the latest terminator film didn’t fit what was thought to be their ideal alpha male. And while I am not here to defend christianity, I will go in and bring further understanding into exactly what an alpha male is. But to answer to initial board question; yes, Jesus was most certainly an alpha male.

You see, an alpha male isn’t something anyone is ever going to read a book or article about and just become. You can buy a thousand books on how to ride a bike, but until you actually climb on one and try it out you won’t know how to ride a bike. The even bigger difference here is, being an alpha male isn’t something that is technical. It isn’t something thats going to be “learned”, its more so something one will naturally become upon engaging within the proper circumstance/s.

Some see it as Alpha males are born, not created, but I disagree with that theory. Sure a young child who has an alpha male role model for a father through imitation and practice can be stimulated into being an alpha male. But was he born that way or was he learned that way? It was learned and I also know that every man out there has the potential to become one upon being confronted with the right stimulus.There is an alpha male hidden inside every one of us, however most will never become it because they’ve chosen to be victims of fear.

An alpha male is not something that can be defined by a set of behaviors. There are too many articles encouraging men to sit with their legs wide-open, and to take up lots of space wherever they go, because “thats what alpha males naturally do”.  And while almost anything can have its own bit of truth, the taking up space theory and behaving like Don Draper in Californication is nonsense. If you think that sitting with your legs wide open is going to increase your chances of getting women enough to make a difference in your love life, you my friend are not in no way an alpha male. I can get a woman with my legs crossed and both of my hands in my pockets, just as effectively as I can get a woman with my legs and arms completely spaced out. It is not my body placement that a woman is attracted to, it is the spirit that is in me. It is the presence that emanates from that spirit. It is my life experiences and courage that have given me my aura. Its is the rough times, the poverty, the being made fun of, the being forced to be different that has created what has made me an alpha male.

As I said before, you’ll never read a book and learn how to be an alpha male. You either are it or you are not. You’re either going to toss yourself into the fire to become one or you’re going to ride out safely in the comfort zones given to you by society. You’ll either be the leader, or you’ll follow the guy who wasn’t as much of a wuss and did all he could to ensure that he possessed something that no one else did.

An Alpha male isn’t rich, and alpha male isn’t poor, and alpha male isn’t fat, and alpha male isn’t skinny, an alpha male isn’t handsome, and an alpha male isn’t ugly, an alpha male doesn’t take up large amounts of space, and a alph… yeah yeah I know. You get the point.

Alpha-ness is a spirit.  Alpha-ness is taking risk and getting uncomfortable. Not using google to become something that someone else has. Every alpha male has his own opinion and set of behaviors that what might compile into why he is an alpha male, but the one thing we all can agree on, is that an alpha male isn’t ever asking questions about what a alpha male is. An alpha male is too focused on being himself.

If you are an alpha male, salute to you and thanks for reading, but if you’re looking to become an alpha male, you need to stop reading and asking questions about alpha males. It’s time to start living. As Jay-z said about some of his peers in the corporate world that he’s surpassed; “they’ve read a lot of books, I’ve lived a lot of life”. When will you stop reading and start putting into action the material that you read?

If you want to become an alpha male you have to get up, get out, and go live. You have to be prepared to experience pain. Just as exercise is pain that causes one to build the body that they want; living life to your highest convictions despite how you feel in the moment will give you the emotional body(alpha-ness) you desire.  You’ll become one naturally after enough experience doing so. You won’t have to try to become it, you’ll just be it, and how to be it won’t even be something you think about.

So yeah, while I have my own reservations about the religion and some of the theologies, Jesus was an alpha male, because he understood that he was on a mission. He stood by his beliefs, did what he felt was best, and wasn’t going to let the opinions of anyone stop him from accomplishing that. He lived his truth, and in layman’s terms, he didn’t give a fuck what anyone in opposition thought about it.

Wanna be Alpha? Get up and go Live.

Peace & Love


For One on One Coaching and Consultations via Skype, Phone, or Instant Messenger; Email: EddieFews@wayoftheplayer.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: ‘The Secret Laws of Social Wisdom: Click Here 

Having Standards Will Help You Control Your Emotional Attachments

One of the most common issues I come across with men who are looking to improve their success with women is that they have no idea what it is they want outside of physical appearance. They don’t have a type, any standards , or a quality they’re looking for. They’re not approaching women because they’re interested in the woman they’re approaching. Men are approaching women because they’re interested in validating their ego by “capturing” or obtaining the conquest that is set before them. It’s all about the challenge of “Can I get her?” and none of it is about, “Is she a fit for me?” When an approach is made from this perspective the man approaching puts all the pressure on himself to be, say, or do whatever he needs to so that he can accomplish his mission. His approach is then about feeling validated. The woman becomes the one who is in power; because, she becomes the key holder for which the man is searching—whether she realizes it or not. If she says “yes,” then the man feels validated and inflated. If she says no, then the opposite happens. Therefore, any man approaching a woman from this perspective is simply playing a numbers games. His approaches are completely subject to chance—the girl’s mood, the weather, how many other guys tried to approach her that day, etc. Not only does this approach reduce a guy’s probability of success to mere chance, but it also creates a host of other future issues that I’ll be covering below.

You see, a man’s visual nature is the main reason this happens. As men, we often find ourselves ridiculing women for their emotional nature—faulting women for making illogical decisions based on how they feel as opposed to what may be best for them. But how often do we make decisions based on what we SEE as opposed to what may be best for us? How often do we chase the beautiful outside yet shitty inside type of girl to no avail? How often do we care about anything other than what she looks like, what her phone number is and when we can get her alone? Now, in no way am I condemning the pursuit of beauty. Being physically attractive is one of the traits the women in our lives must have, but that should be a given and nothing more. That should only be what makes us give them consideration. It shouldn’t  be what makes us interested beyond a conversation. No more than we would require water to be clear and without debris before we consider drinking it, should we require a woman to be attractive before we consider being interested in her. Now could clear water still be contaminated?  Absolutely. And in the same light beautiful women could still very well be contaminated physically, emotionally, and psychologically. Therefore as men, we need to be more concerned with a woman’s contents than with how clear and visibly drinkable she may be on the outside. Now if all you’re looking for is a friends with benefits situation or a one-night stand while you’re out approaching women then by all means proceed, so long as your intentions have been communicated. (Now, I think we should also raise our standards beyond just beauty for the type of women we’re looking to be friends with benefits with as well.) But the problem i’m discovering is that too many guys are getting emotionally attached to these women that they haven’t investigated for contamination before deciding to drink from them. As a result, they’re getting emotionally sick and distraught when things don’t work out.

So how should you approach?

First of all, what is it that you want? Do you even know? Are you aware of the qualities, attributes, or type of history you require as a standard for a woman you’re giving the time of day? We all know women want to feel special; they want to feel “CHOSEN” not as if you’ve settled for them. They want to know that you could’ve selected any woman you wanted , but you decided on her because she met your requirements. Her emotional attachment to you will be partially based upon how much thought and energy you put into choosing her. Now if you just chose her because she was attractive it’s going to be a challenge for her to put her trust in you because she sees attractive women all time. How many of them could easily replace her? If that’s all it took for you to want to be with her; that’s all it’ll take for you to want to be with another woman. With that being said, when you approach a woman you must approach her to find out whether or not she meets your standards (once you get some). I know I don’t want a woman who doesn’t have a decent relationship with her father, because her relationship with her father has potential to be a reflection of her relationship with me. Now if the dads isn’t available or if she’s made a concerted effort to reach out to him in attempt to build a relationship, then that’s entirely different from a woman who doesn’t have the desire for a relationship with her father. So when I am out talking to women one of the very first conversations I have with her or listen for or discuss is how they easily they bring up, praise, or talk about their dads. Upon consistent hearing healthy mentions of her dad, or statements about their relationship, I decide that I can invest a bit more interest in her. I also don’t want a woman who has had a large number of sexual partners. For several psychological, physical, emotional and spiritual reasons; one of which this chart talks about below:

 

The more sexual partners a woman has had before marriage the more likely she is to be a contributor to an unhappy, unstable marriage. I’ve spoken before about the more a woman gives something up the less value she will begin to put on that what she’s given up. Where most virgins will develop a strong emotional attachment after sex, highly promiscuous women will put less value on sex and develop less attachment to the people because of how frequently she’s already done it.

Now these are just a few of several of my standards. And don’t make my standards your standards just because you’re reading this article (unless of course they resonate). What are your standards? List them. When you approach a woman, make sure a good deal of the conversation you have with her centers around whether or not she fits your standards. Also understand during this process that no woman is going to meet every single standard on your list; but, let’s say you have nine core standards that you’re looking for in a woman. If she meets six to seven of those standards she’s definitely someone you could continue  dating and seeing as a potential for something more.

Now this process benefits us in a few ways… It allows the women we date to value us as someone who isn’t interested in dating just any woman and trust us more because of this. It also allows us to have a more realistic perspective on the women we’re dealing with before we become too emotionally invested. What I’ve discovered from my own life and the guys that i’ve worked with is that once we’re emotionally invested, (and god help us if we’re emotionally invested on looks alone) the less we want to know the real details about the women we’re dealing with. We fall victim to the fantasy. We want to believe that the woman we’re interested in is some magical fairy just because we have feelings for her. Surely our ego won’t allow us to feel like we could become emotionally invested in some girl who has lived her whole life in such a way that is destructive to her future and ours. Surely we’re emotionally smarter than that… Or are we?

When you find out on the first or second day of dealing with a woman that she has ten children by ten different men and that she’s been on and off drugs her whole life, you’re more likely to decide that she’s probably not for you. But lets say you met this same woman and took interest in her because she was beautiful. And lets say you spent thousands of dollars, lots of time, and energy going on dates, sleeping with her, and developing strong emotional connections without the conversation of her children and drug abuse ever coming up in the conversation. Then later it casually comes out after all of this investment. Could you still walk away given all that you’ve invested?  I’ve known  a number of guys who ended up marrying women who were prostitutes all simply because they didn’t discover who the woman truly was until after they were mentally, physically, and financially so invested that they developed a emotional attachment with the women far too strong for them to do anything about it.

So when you approach a woman and do so from a position of “I know I am good enough, I’m just here to find out if you meet my requirements” not only does it put you in an attractive position of leadership, but it also saves you a lot of emotional investment for someone who may or may not be worth it. It gives you a realistic view point of them. It keeps you from putting them on a pedestal. It gives you a clarity of vision so that you can deal with them accordingly. Once this is done; the woman has no choice but to be emotionally connected to your process of “choosing” as opposed to your process of settling just because you like the way that she looks.

Lets get some standards guys. Grab a pen and paper or open up a note file on your smart phone, and list standards that you’re going to require the future women you approach to meet if you’re going to consider investing in them. Do research, find legitimate standards so that you can discuss them with others if necessary. You’ll be saving yourself a lot of time and energy, and you’ll come across much more attractive to all the women you approach in the future.

Thanks for reading.

Eddie Fews


For One on One Coaching and Consultations via Skype, Phone, or Instant Messenger; Email: EddieFews@Gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: The Secret Laws of Social Wisdom’ Click Here 

You Must Upgrade Your Life – Standards

I know I have written multiple articles about raising and sticking to a higher standard, but I really can’t stress enough how important your standards are to your success with women and every other aspect of your life.

You need to put checks and balances on every aspect of your life.

Over the holiday season I began putting on a few extra pounds because I lowered the standard of what I was willing to place in my body, not to mention how much of it. By neglecting a standard I once held for what I would eat and drink the state of my physical appeal wasn’t as high as it once was.

The moment I became aware of it and made the DECISION to work myself back to my original weight the pounds began to come off. The standard for what you are willing to accept is going to be a direct reflection of what begins to surround you.

Women have to be attracted to me; they just do, that’s my standard for myself and simply won’t accept anything less. I won’t allow God, Mother nature, the universe etc. to hand me anything less this full blown positive attention from women. It’s in complete conflict with my reality; its simply not possible. I may sound like a mad man to some ” You can’t force someone to be attracted you to” and you’re right. I can’t, but because of my mind frame, the energy I emit into the world around me is undeniable.

The way I walk, the way I talk, the way I write, the way I smile, sip my water, drive my car, etc. all comes from the frame of someone who will be desired. Personally I think if I’m not number one I’m in the top three greatest looking Men to ever walk the face of the earth.

Sure you may disagree, but it is a pleasant way of thinking and so it is the way that I choose to live my life. And besides, who are you to tell me I’m wrong? You would certainly have to be better looking to do so.. See where I’m going with this?

One thing you must understand about women is, they’re only in support of what it is that you truly believe at your core. If you truly and deeply believe you are the sexiest man on the planet and they test your sense of self assurance(they will) and your results are in agreement with your frame, who are they to tell you any different? Note: This level of confidence should apply to every single area of your life and not just you’re looks.

Its time to raise the standards of everything we are willing to accept and project; is your current girlfriend all that you want a woman to be in your life? Are your friends pushing you, supporting you, and criticizing you when necessary in damn near every aspect of your life? Is your partner? If not, it may time to recognize your worth and begin searching elsewhere.

Find Inspiration

I discovered a new artist a couple weeks ago by the name of Marian Mereba; she isn’t very popular yet but as soon as I began listening to some of her music I realized that there was something uniquely unusual about her. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it but I could’t stop listening. Just yesterday(Valentines Day) she released her EP as I began listening, one particular song caught my attention. ” Go To London ” the lyrics are as follows;

“Can’t believe how fast time flew,
Taking with it, both me and you,
accidentally fell like fools ,
now its aching to break from you,
but I say go to london,
you won’t write and I won’t call you often.

Take the best of me,
I’ll keep the rest of me.

Go to London,
you won’t write and I won’t call you often.
Go to london,
If you don’t try, you will always be wondering.

About london.
About London.

So take the best of me,
I’ll keep the rest of me.

And go to London.

Darling can’t you see,
theres more to you than loving me.

So go to london.
You won’t write and I won’t call you often,
go to London..”

The depth of this song really got me thinking about my current life and my past relationships. Have I ever been with a woman that was willing push me to pursue my dreams and passions even at the expense of our relationship? A woman that would throw away everything we have built and worked on as a unit just to see me successful. I can’t say I have but because of the inspiration I found in the song; I now refuse to accept anything less than this within any future relationship.

We are often told to think big although most of us are already thinking as big as our mind our allowing to. A child in a third world country can’t possibly dream or think of being the number #1 stock broker in the United States because they haven’t seen one or heard of one. I never thought or dreamed of the kind of relationship spoke about in this song for the very same reason and now that I have, my standards have officially risen.

You Can Eat Your Cake Too

There is a popular expression that goes; ” You can’t have your cake and eat it too” meaning we don’t live in the perfect world so you can’t possibly get everything you want. I think that’s bullshit; whats the point of getting the cake if you can’t eat it? Phrases as such only hinder people from wanting to pursue their dreams. I get paid to take men out, talk to women, and party ; I’m attractive, funny and intelligent. I can honestly say I’m eating my cake; its time you begin eating yours.

I want to challenge every WOTP Reader out there to sit down with a pen and paper and evaluate every important area of their lives. Make a list of your standards and boundaries for each area and next to them write what your standards and boundaries could be. Even if at first it seems impossible. Anyone who has ever made major changes in the world was once called crazy by many before proving them wrong.
When you analyze your relationship; push your current partner to live up to your new standards; if they are incapable or not giving the effort, I believe its time to find someone who will.

Think bigger, dream bigger, and raise your standards every time you find the inspiration to do so. And you will granted with a happiness you never thought possible. Have your cake and eat it.

Eddie Fews

For One on One Coaching and Consultations via Skype, Phone, or Instant Messenger; Email: EddieFews@gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: The Secret Laws of Social Wisdom’ Click Here